Birds 'n' Bees
by Reijiro
Summary: TT:? - Every parent knows they're gonna get this question... Some mild language and sexual references.


A/N: This is my first fanfic. Kind of a one off, though I am currently writing the back story (starting 8 years before this)! For some reason the idea for this story popped into my head at 3am the other night and kept me awake 'til 4, so I figured I may as well write it down. Hope you like it!

Birds 'n' Bees

The heat rising from the water seemed to creep up her arms as she scrubbed the dishes and was threatening to overwhelm her. The hearty kick from the little being in her womb was the last straw. Tausha threw the washcloth into the sink and tottered over to a chair at the table, thankful to rest her swollen body for a moment until the dizziness subsided.

"Damn heat" she muttered under breath as she ran her hands over her face, resting them over her eyes. The darkness made her feel a little better, cooler. She listened to the sounds of the rest of her family in the living room. Thud, thwack, grunt…. "Don't have a cow, man!"…. whack, "Yaah" whump! She smiled to herself. Whoever would have thought she would have ended up here. Simpsons and sparring; that was how most evenings were spent with her family. She missed being able to join in with the exercise, well wouldn't be too much longer now until she could once again.

She broke from her contemplation as her eldest son entered, heading for the fridge. "Hey Mum, you OK?" "Yeah, just feeling a bit tired. What are you after?" "Just a drink." She grimaced a little as another kick shifted the front of her dress. Her son brought the water bottle and a glass over to the table, and sat in front of her with a sigh. "It's gonna be another boy, isn't it?" She smiled "That's my bet". He placed a hand on her tummy, feeling the little creature moving about. "Damn, it's really strong isn't it?"

She scowled at him "Don't swear Ben" she muttered resignedly. "Sorry, Mum" with no real remorse in his tone, distracted by the motions under his hand as she rolled her eyes. Silence descended at the table for a few moments, broken by the sounds from the TV in the next room.

"Hey Mum, where do baby's come from? I mean I know they come from in here" patting her tummy lightly "but how do they get in there to start off with?" She froze for a moment. Every parent knows they are gonna get this question; "but why now?" she thought, she was tired, achy and fed-up. She thought of calling his father in to help explain, but dismissed the idea quickly. That would probably make the explanation take three times longer than necessary, and she would still be the one doing the explaining in the end anyway, probably with her other two boys as additional audience members.

Tausha took a deep breath, sat up straight and looked her 6 year old son in the eye. "It all starts with something called sex…" "SEX? Eewwwww!" Recovering from her shock she asked "You know what sex is?" Ben hesitated, sensing something in his mother's mood. He was on .delicate ground here, though he didn't know why. "Yeah, Unca Mike told me about it." Her right eyebrow started to twitch "Why?" "Umm, 'cos I kinda saw him doin' it with Callah…but I swear I didn't mean too!" Both eyebrows started to migrate up her forehead, though the right still twitched a little "And this was when?"

Ben shuffled uncomfortably in his chair "A couple of weeks ago I was late for morning practice. I nearly ran into old lady Johansson, but I heard her coming up the stairs just in time, so I ducked into Unca Mike's place to hide."

Ms Johansson was the last of the original tenants in the building. She lived on the 5th floor, right under April and Casey's place, and above their own apartment. Tausha was sure the old girl knew all about them, but the kids didn't know that, and it was good to keep them on their toes even within their own home. There were plenty of others out there, her own father included, who would hurt them just for being what they were.

Ben had paused for a moment, trying to think of the right way to tell what happened next. "Anyway, when I got inside I heard Unca Mike groanin', I thought he was hurt or something. His bedroom door was open a bit so I looked in, just to make sure he was OK. I saw Callah on top of him, she was biting his neck, and it looked like Unca Mike was trying to push her off…. sort of. I thought she was attacking him or somethin', so I tried to help"

Ben glanced up at his Mum to see her reaction to his story; her eyebrows remained on their lofty perch, though the twitch seemed to have transferred itself to her eyes; almost like she was trying not to show an emotion on her face. Ben hoped this was a sign he wasn't in trouble, his Mum had never been one to hold back when she was angry about something.

Sensing her son needed a prod to continue his story Tausha simply asked "How did you help, baby?" Not really knowing why Ben blushed a little, remembering the scene, then continued. "I ran in and jumped on the bed to try to knock Callah off, but she freaked out when she saw me and ran into the bathroom before I could hit her. Then Unca Mike grabbed me and flipped me onto the floor; I don't think he meant to throw me Mum" Ben defended his favourite uncle as his mother's brow furrowed "and I did a great break-fall too! Anyway, when I stood up Unca Mike was sat on the edge of the bed, with a pillow on his lap. He asked me what I was doing and when I told him he just started laughing."

"Callah didn't sound very happy though, she even swore at Unca Mike as she was yelling something about being so embarrassed she was gonna die! I got a bit scared then, she was freaking out so much I thought she might attack Unca Mike again! But Unca Mike just whispered to me to ignore her as he'd deal with her later and asked if I was OK. I mean, of course I was, but I asked him why they were fightin'."

"I didn't think he was gonna answer, he just looked really confused. Then, really quietly, I don't think he wanted Callah to hear and freak out some more, he told me they weren't fighting they were having sex. When I asked him what that was he said that when a boy and a girl like each other very much they do a special cuddle and it feels really, really, really good, but it was also a really private kinda thing. I dunno, it didn't look like they were cuddling to me."

Ben glanced up again, yeah he was definitely in the clear, his Mum had a funny 'I'm trying not to smile' smile on her face, though she was still trying to look all serious. He tried to joke "Heh, then Unca Mike told Dad about it after practice, and he said "Well at least you'll know more about birds and bees than I did, kid" imitating his father well. The smile evaporated from his mother's face "Your father knows about this?" Ben gulped, uh oh "Umm, well yeah…"

Tausha leaned back with a thoughtful gaze meandering towards the living room. Evil ideas on just how she would make her partner pay for not letting her in on this little secret filtered through her mind for a moment. Then remembering why this discussion had started in the first place, she refocused on her son.

"Ben, you know girls and boys are different, right?" "Sure." "Well, Mikey was right, when a man and a women love each other they do hug, in a special way…" She went on explaining sex and conception in a steady, clear tone, using the scientific names of the organs and processes involved, and making sure he understood the whole procedure.

When she had finished Ben had a slightly awed look on is face. "Damn, I hope I haven't given him information overload" Tausha thought as she waited for his response to her lesson. She could almost hear the cogs turning in his head as he digested the new information. Suddenly he looked up at her with a bit of a frown. Quietly he asked "Does that mean that you and Dad have sex too?" "Well, yes" "Eewww, gross!"

"What's gross" asked Raph as he walked in on the end of the conversation "YOU… and MUM… having **SEX**! Yuck!" Ben slipped off the chair and stalked past his father, back to the living room. "What the…?" started Raph, giving his wife a quizzical glance. "Well at least he didn't faint." She beamed at him, with just a hint of sarcasm. He glowered back, she was never gonna let him forget that was she? "I did NOT faint, I was in shock, and I doubt you just told him he was gonna be a Dad." "No, and at least HE can't consider it an impossibility either…" she grinned over her shoulder as she got up and returned to the dishes in the sink.

He glowered at her back for a few moments, confused. Then it dawned on him what Ben must have told her. A smile crept on his face as he thought of a way to get her back.

Sidling up behind her he wrapped his hands around her hips and nuzzled close to her ear "You know there is a really good reason I didn't tell ya about Ben walking in on Mike and Callah…" She lifted her head a little in defiance, and to give him better access to her neck "There had better be…" "Of course, you've just been too emotional lately and I knew you would overreact." He felt her stiffen. Grinning, he dotted little kisses from her ear down her neck to the edge of the tattoo on her shoulder as she slowly dried her hands on the tea towel, the rest of the dishes abandoned yet again.

He lifted his head to meet her eyes as she turned towards him, the sparks he saw there warned him he had hit his mark. "What?' she demanded in a dangerous tone. He smirked, then trying to imitate Donnie's 'scientific' tone "Well given your current condition and our previous experiences when you have been in this condition I thought it wise to wait until you…" "What do you mean 'my **condition**', I AM **NOT** TOO DAMN EMOTIONAL! Jerk!" She stormed past him and left the kitchen with as much dignity as her swollen stomach would allow. A fast waddle was about the best she could accomplish.

Grinning to himself Raph cocked his head to listen as Tausha swept through the living room issuing orders to the boys to clean up and get ready for bed. Raph wasn't worried; he knew she would probably try to continue this little battle of wills later; he would probably lose too, though in the nicest possible way. He sighed as he turned to finish the dishes.


End file.
